With a degree in Political Science and a long time fascination with politics, you would think I would have been involved in a campaign by now. In reality, nope! Study vs reality is interesting. My assisting a friend in his bid for a City Council seat came via "I'll help you but you owe me" situation. It is my payment to the piper!
So I took on my first time at the "door to door" thing. Its really kinda cool. You meet all kinds of people. Hear interesting things and sometimes get hilarious responses. Or people who peer at you through the door, worried you are some religion peddler. As the evening went on I felt like I was getting the hang of it. Almost enjoying it. It was driving down the street a few days later that gave me a kick. All those people we had talked to and said they would take a sign now had signs. It was like my candidate 'owned' the street. A cool feeling. Especially cool because this guy is really genuine. A good person who is astute and knows how to play the politics game so well. AND he is still a good guy with an amazing wife supporting him in this.
Its pretty awesome being carried with someone else's enthusiasm for a change. I suppose this is what some people feel when I draw them into one of my endeavors. It feels good to be part of something. I am actually looking forward to my next canvassing effort!
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
Whooooaaa...... wow!
Man life is crazy. When you are looking, sometimes what you are seeking sneaks up and smacks you upside the head. I am so open to anything and everything in the 'space' I am in right now. Heck, I apparently mutter "wow" in my sleep. Must be my subconscious speaking aloud about all that I have experienced in the last fourteen months. Lessons. Should I list them?
1. People and life experience teach the best lessons.
2. People will love you, hate you, do things you cannot understand. And you know what? It isnt about what you are/are not/have/do not have...... it is about what they are focused on. What you evoke in them. What you mirror back to them. They choose their response to you, not the other way around.
3. It really hurts when people do not live up to the potential you see in them, or the person they lead you to believe was reality. You can only see what others let you in to see, but on top of this we suffer from seeing what we want to see.
4. Being authentically who you are and centred is not always easy, but it is SO JOYFUL. Ahhh.
5. Opening your heart and head to all the possibilities and energies around you brings back incredible opportunities.
Today I feel touched by warmth despite the chill in my office (heat on in September??). I feel lucky. Despite knowing I am physically tired, I feel mentally refreshed today. Beautiful. I am believing in my 2% rule. Even when things are tough, I know I am tougher and days I have this inner feeling make up for those. Ahhhhh..... if you are reading this, I want you to close your eyes and feel my arms wrapping around you and giving you a REAL hug. One where you feel squeezed and drawn into warmth. Where our hearts touch for a moment, mine telling yours to feel the love around you. My lips touching your forehead and a silent wish resting there that you will feel wisdom and inner peace of self.
1. People and life experience teach the best lessons.
2. People will love you, hate you, do things you cannot understand. And you know what? It isnt about what you are/are not/have/do not have...... it is about what they are focused on. What you evoke in them. What you mirror back to them. They choose their response to you, not the other way around.
3. It really hurts when people do not live up to the potential you see in them, or the person they lead you to believe was reality. You can only see what others let you in to see, but on top of this we suffer from seeing what we want to see.
4. Being authentically who you are and centred is not always easy, but it is SO JOYFUL. Ahhh.
5. Opening your heart and head to all the possibilities and energies around you brings back incredible opportunities.
Today I feel touched by warmth despite the chill in my office (heat on in September??). I feel lucky. Despite knowing I am physically tired, I feel mentally refreshed today. Beautiful. I am believing in my 2% rule. Even when things are tough, I know I am tougher and days I have this inner feeling make up for those. Ahhhhh..... if you are reading this, I want you to close your eyes and feel my arms wrapping around you and giving you a REAL hug. One where you feel squeezed and drawn into warmth. Where our hearts touch for a moment, mine telling yours to feel the love around you. My lips touching your forehead and a silent wish resting there that you will feel wisdom and inner peace of self.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Growing Wisdom
It was Confucius who said “There are three methods to gaining wisdom. The first is reflection, which is the highest. The second is limitation, which is the easiest. The third is experience, which is the bitterest.”
Ahhhh. Indeed. My year has without doubt been one of reflection. Looking at my own reflection, determining who it is looking back. Looking at the image of past behaviours and contemplating the "why" and the lessons learned.
Limitation is the challenge. Learning to continue to strive and try and move forward when all you are doing is running to standing still. How well I know this feeling. And true, each time has brought wisdom and when finally the limitations were passed, I saw their significance.
Experience is that which fuels the others. Without it, we would have nothing to reflect on and nothing to be limited within. One great gift I feel that has been given to me as of late is the ability to see the connections within my own experience. A sort of perspective, like I stand aside and all that was and is has focus in that moment. It isn't a feeling experienced consistently, but instead in stolen moments or times when my mind is finally still. So rare.
Looking at where I am, I feel rooted. Today I walked the gardens, and when taking a picture of the squash I took off my shoes and walked barefoot in the soil of the field. Sinking through, toes immersed in the fluffy soil, and what I thought of was "rooted". I feel rooted. And there is wisdom in that. Knowing who you are is wisdom, and being able to accept crap or beauty all in stride... that is important. It all takes time. But for all the soul touching people who have dipped but their toes in my pool, thank you. Some of you, oh how I wish that you had wanted to swim a while. Perhaps set up camp and visit the shoreline, explore the beauty. Not with the intent of permanent residency in your heart but with the bravery and desire to explore the wilds of me. Others, you came and went and I know why. Wisdom is to see the limitation of you, take the lessons you brought and accept the experience for both the beauty and pain. How could we know love if we did not experience indifference? How could we understand pain if happiness had not been had to contrast it with?
For me, the wisdom gained has been that everything includes elements of both. Like the yin and the yang, balance of black and white, light and dark.... It is all part of the deal.
Ahhhh. Indeed. My year has without doubt been one of reflection. Looking at my own reflection, determining who it is looking back. Looking at the image of past behaviours and contemplating the "why" and the lessons learned.
Limitation is the challenge. Learning to continue to strive and try and move forward when all you are doing is running to standing still. How well I know this feeling. And true, each time has brought wisdom and when finally the limitations were passed, I saw their significance.
Experience is that which fuels the others. Without it, we would have nothing to reflect on and nothing to be limited within. One great gift I feel that has been given to me as of late is the ability to see the connections within my own experience. A sort of perspective, like I stand aside and all that was and is has focus in that moment. It isn't a feeling experienced consistently, but instead in stolen moments or times when my mind is finally still. So rare.
Looking at where I am, I feel rooted. Today I walked the gardens, and when taking a picture of the squash I took off my shoes and walked barefoot in the soil of the field. Sinking through, toes immersed in the fluffy soil, and what I thought of was "rooted". I feel rooted. And there is wisdom in that. Knowing who you are is wisdom, and being able to accept crap or beauty all in stride... that is important. It all takes time. But for all the soul touching people who have dipped but their toes in my pool, thank you. Some of you, oh how I wish that you had wanted to swim a while. Perhaps set up camp and visit the shoreline, explore the beauty. Not with the intent of permanent residency in your heart but with the bravery and desire to explore the wilds of me. Others, you came and went and I know why. Wisdom is to see the limitation of you, take the lessons you brought and accept the experience for both the beauty and pain. How could we know love if we did not experience indifference? How could we understand pain if happiness had not been had to contrast it with?
For me, the wisdom gained has been that everything includes elements of both. Like the yin and the yang, balance of black and white, light and dark.... It is all part of the deal.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Re-build, Re-focus, Re-configure, Re-.......
All of the above seems to be where I am at. Phhhwwwthhh. Grrr. I am not particularly happy with what is the status quo right now. After a great weekend of escapism, it seems the energies of the world are set to pull me in and anchor me to the less than savory realities of adulthood. From my insurance company telling me they don't want to insure me anymore.... to bills piling up for all those adult requirements! There is a part of me just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I can feel the panic rising, bubbling up in my chest and touching my lily (so to speak!).
I fear I am dropping the balls around me.... they are slipping out of my hands and spilling everywhere and I am scrambling to pick them up and am not sure why I am and what I am to do with them all....
Surely this too will pass. And yes, there are many good things. Damn my coffee tastes good! Yay, I can come to work without doing/brushing my hair! I can listen to any radio station I want at work! I have good friends who I know are there for me, I just have to reach out.
So, I will not curl up in a fetal position on my bed with the duvet pulled over my head (no matter how appealing it may be) and I will try to focus on lessons learned instead of feeling abandoned by the people who have dropped out of my life without explanation. Stay positive. Chin up. This too shall pass as I RE-FOCUS, RE-GENERATE, RE-CREATE who I am.
I fear I am dropping the balls around me.... they are slipping out of my hands and spilling everywhere and I am scrambling to pick them up and am not sure why I am and what I am to do with them all....
Surely this too will pass. And yes, there are many good things. Damn my coffee tastes good! Yay, I can come to work without doing/brushing my hair! I can listen to any radio station I want at work! I have good friends who I know are there for me, I just have to reach out.
So, I will not curl up in a fetal position on my bed with the duvet pulled over my head (no matter how appealing it may be) and I will try to focus on lessons learned instead of feeling abandoned by the people who have dropped out of my life without explanation. Stay positive. Chin up. This too shall pass as I RE-FOCUS, RE-GENERATE, RE-CREATE who I am.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Boundaries
It seems boundaries are meant to be challenged. Flexible, evolving, changing. Seems when I think I have one figured out and set --- someone waltzes in and causes a state of flux. I love it and hate it. I love the wow, I love the unexpected at the same time as hating it. Deliciousness of unpredictable and fear of not being able to control it.
In the mirror is me
the same face and smile
Just a more comfortable skin
Leaning in
I wonder what others can see if they look closely
into my eyes
Is it that visible?
The change of thought
Awareness
of all that is not
and what can be if only
I let it?
In the mirror is me
the same face and smile
Just a more comfortable skin
Leaning in
I wonder what others can see if they look closely
into my eyes
Is it that visible?
The change of thought
Awareness
of all that is not
and what can be if only
I let it?
Thursday, September 2, 2010
When one door closes, another opens up
Letting go of them or this
Not easy
Realizing what you thought you wanted
Was not the case
Running faster to standing still
Trying harder and reaching farther and being more
Yet,
Being less.
It is what I am learning
What I am gaining
To stop and see and feel and be
Turning and catching that glimpse of me and recognizing her
Opening up and letting them, it, all
In
Terrifying
In its beautiful possibilities and options
Endless in the now
Wanting no promises or securities but honest clarity
Just the real now
Present and beautiful
Filling me
Testing and pushing me
Onwards
Not easy
Realizing what you thought you wanted
Was not the case
Running faster to standing still
Trying harder and reaching farther and being more
Yet,
Being less.
It is what I am learning
What I am gaining
To stop and see and feel and be
Turning and catching that glimpse of me and recognizing her
Opening up and letting them, it, all
In
Terrifying
In its beautiful possibilities and options
Endless in the now
Wanting no promises or securities but honest clarity
Just the real now
Present and beautiful
Filling me
Testing and pushing me
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