Body

connected
with muscles, tendons and skin
smooth and curved
bruises, bumps painted on for detail
scars character
dependably strong yet not utilitarian
saturated in energy
lushness hidden
warmth and languid limbs
not delicate except in details
mine

Reduced to a box

.... my life anyway. Reduced to the contents of a variety of boxes. And how liberating it is to just have it all boxed up and stacked so neatly. There is no urgent feeling to open the boxes. It has made me all to aware of how little I care about most of the "things" in my life. I honestly think I could go back to the University me who was two rubbermaid bins, a garment bag and a duffle bag, the one who moved every 4 months. Makes me realize why I am not a packrat. Not to mention, that in this digital age all we need is a laptop and a jump drive full of photos. No heavy albums.

When it is all boxed and cubically contained I wonder if I will feel the urge to leave it all behind? Unfortunately, or fortunately... depending which side you're on in my life, it is all just a feeling. I am too committed to the things in my life that need me and way to sensible. But that little cabin somewhere way up north.... the one with no running water, that I would winter out in it and experience first thaws of the north in.... It still calls!

Outward calmness
subdued and still
for some displays contentment
I am quelching the inner terror

Pressure sensed as moist humid air clinging
Breathing pinched tight
extremities cold
Waterlily stem withered under the hold

Life and decisions
me you we us them
community
inner and outer with yes challenging no

Too many voices buzzing
decisions beyond my current grasp
I retreat
Searching a haven